When was the last time you sat with your child and had a meaningless conversation? When had you together laughed loud over a tongue twister or a wardrobe malfunction?
When I say “Meaningless”, I know I would have many eyebrows up against me.
The best time me and my son have are those meaningless conversations. I narrate him the stories of my childhood, my friends, how I made mistakes, how I learnt and became the person he adores.
He in turn talks about his dreams, his friends, his school and everything and anything which comes to his mind. Though he aspires to be a footballer one day, he’s a lazy kid who will get tired at 200m but when we have these conversations, he can even walk 5 km uphill.
One of the best vacations we had was in Jim Corbett forest 2 years back. When we planned, we were asked what would you do for 5 days there. We would get up in the morning, go for a walk, have breakfast, a session of monopoly. Another walk before lunch and then a game of monopoly. Afternoon siesta, followed by evening walk, dinner and another round of monopoly.
We relish those moments and keep planning such relaxing holidays with no WiFi, no malls and no activities to do.
Go to beaches, get dirty, build sandcastles. Play in waves. Watch movies together not in theaters but at your couch, cuddle them, have pillow fights, have bear fights, hug a lot,kiss a lot and just take it easy. Children won’t be children ever but friends for lifetime.
Conversations are not preachings or instructions.
“Finish up your homework.”
“How was your day?”
“What do you want for dinner?”
These are routine questions and can be even delivered by your nanny.
Conversations are when you connect with your child at his level, and he at yours. The time frame could be as short as 10-15 minutes daily, but be there with your child each day where he sees you as a human being and not just a figure of authority.
Children grow up soon, and they will not always require that authoritative figure in their life, but they will always want a friend to turn to, a place where they will not be judged, a place which feels like home, a shoulder to cry, a pillow to vent. Forge that relationship and it will be these moments that child will relish and come back to always.
Consider your child as a member of a family and not just a child. When the going gets tough, when there are problems, engage them and ask for their opinions. That out of box thinking which we lose as adults is very much intact in them. This will make them feel loved and wanted, a prized member of the family. This will fill them with confidence and they would try to solve their own problems rather than just falling back.
As I read today morning, “Make memories they last for a lifetime.”
I am taking part in AtoZ Blogging Challenge this april and this is my post for letter C.