War zone

This time I promised myself, I will not bend. I will not ask Sorry, nor will I message him. No, Absolutely No, I will not call him first. I stomp away from the room, banging the door loudly.

I reach my office angry, waiting to pounce on the first one who commits mistake.

A hour passes by, I pick up my phone. Check what’s app, check messenger, double check if I missed any call.

Another hour, I check if my WiFi is working. May be it’s too slow. I switch on the cellular to double check if I missed something.

“Ok Fine, you do not care about me! Couldn’t even sent a message to ask if I am ok.” I type my rapid fire of questions, then delete them again.”

Tick Tock, another hour chimes, I can’t wait anymore. My patience is running out. I pick up the phone, go to favorites where his number is saved. Should I dial/ Should I not? I keep looking at the number, as if the number would answer me.

Finally, after an hour it’s a panic. I can no longer stop myself. I type an angry message. He replies back. Obviously, at work he is busy, and unlike me can shut his emotional part of brain. He tries to send a neutral reply. I’m still not calm. It was his fault. He should have said sorry. He should have tried to make up. Instead it’s me who messaged and what a reply I get.

My anger climbs up another ladder. How dare he? How can he be so calm, yet I am the one who’s smoking like a barbecue. Angry, I block him on what’s app, messenger wherever I can. Even I put his number on blocked list, so that my smartphone warns me not to pick it up.

A few more hours pass. I start missing him.

“He must be missing me.” I unblock him.

Still no message, no call.

The anger boils in once more. I should not have been with him only. This is the gratitude I get for loving him so much.

I type a few angry texts. He replies with limited words. And later goes offline.

I cry and miss my favourite coffee break. With a heavy heart, I drive back home, wiping my eyes at each signal.

Unaware of my emotional turmoil, he is busy watching TV. Seeing him so calm and aloof, i am like an active Volcano.

“I didn’t even have food today. Kept waiting for you to call me up/ or at least message me.” I shout loud.

“Janu, I was busy” comes his reply. “And you are unnecessarily getting hyper.”

I eat a little dinner and go to sleep red eyed. Later he comes to bed, holds me close till I sleep. I cry myself to sleep, say sorry for the umpteenth time.

Another day ends, Another fight remains unresolved.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Powered by WordPress.com.

Up ↑

Beat About The Book

Read, Write, Talk

A mind of my own

Dr Anshu's blog

Imperfectly Perfect

Love.Life. and Everything Inbetween

Everyday Gyaan

Keeping Life Simple, Authentic And Holistic


My serendipitous wanderings

Dad That Cooks

Making food your family will love


Philosophy for the Curious Mind

Swati's blog

Today is the best day. What has happened can never be undone. What will happen next, no one can say. So why waste your life, LIVE IN TODAY AND THAT TOO YOUR WAY

%d bloggers like this: