Silences and conversations

Speech is silver, silence is gold.

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courtesy : www. pinterest.com

 

This was what I learnt all my life. If someone hurls you abuses, don’t reply back, just stay silent. If you don’t agree, don’t get into arguments, just keep silent. If you don’t like something, just keep it to yourself. For silence is golden.

All this seemed believable. Why get into unnecessary drama?

Till recently, I came across two real scenarios.

Scenario 1

A picture perfect relation. The couple who never fight. A relationship you look upto.   Made for each other types, who can understand each other, just by looking at one another. Never have any fights, no arguments. No one would say a thing, that would hurt each other. So much so that, they avoid any argument. Yet there are things which trobule either of them. So Both look for conversations outside the marriage. They love each other so much that they cannot not hurt one another.

Scenario 2

A not so perfect couple. They fight over petty things. They too love each other, so much so that they can’t sleep till there are unresolved issues. Yet they will have an argument, they will fight and still be together. Yet their hearts are clear, no hidden feelings.

Which one would you like to have?

silence-is-gold
courtesy : buzzle.com

 

How is a relation without the deep meaningful conversations? Hollow, empty from within. You may talk about everything, yet if in a relation, you don’t talk to each other about your deepest fears, if you fail to sit and discuss with each other what you disagree on, there will be always gap in that relationship. You will look for validation not from within, not from spouse, but you will try to find a validation in the outside world. This can become a seed for extramarital affairs.

So, when something troubles you, go and speak up. It’s not the viewpoints which hurt, but sometimes the way or the tone in which they are said hurt people. So, find what troubles and try to put your argument in a different way.

But converse, and break your silence especially for the people who matter.

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Courtesy : http://www.rishikajain.com

You wronged me.

When I was small, I looked at you Like my Father, brother or a friend.

As i grew bigger, I realized you do not look at me the same way.

The changes in my body, have made you drool over me.

Yet, I am not an object of lust.

Most of us even in India have a privilege of being born in safe secure homes, where we are loved, respected and protected by our families. We grow up looking at  our fathers and brothers, on how male figures are in a female’s life and look around trusting them. We go to schools and colleges, and make friends with boys, and that trust is there coz that’s what we have learnt. We marry and entrust our husbands with all the faith.

We come from the land of Durga and Saraswati.We come from the land where Female power is the supreme, Where without a GAURI POOJAN, even A GANESH UTSAV is not complete. We come from the land where, a female goddess is worshipped before every occasion.

Today, in that same land, I do not feel safe. If i wear skirt,unseen eyes imagine rest of my legs. If i wear Jeans and a top, unfelt hands imagine them over me.

When Nirbhaya was rapped, it was not she alone, but all the wives, sisters and daughters were rapped enmasse.

When few days before, few men who walked on streets of bangalore, it was not just those females, we all were wronged by the entire generation of males.

Let us stop expecting from the society to change, Come let’s empower each one of us and fight for us.